Category Archives: Healthy Behavior Basics

Take the Negative Stress Out of Positive Change

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A small dose of discipline can evolve into a lasting, life changing habit.

When we consider results-oriented change, discipline and habit ultimately combine to form the foundation for our achievements. Discipline is the act of regularly working at something until it efficiently works for you as a habit. You can habitually invest money and watch it grow. You can invest the right amounts of healthy food into your body and feel yourself become more energized. You can move your body in optimal ways and become stronger.

When you call on discipline, you’re training yourself to complete a specific behavior. If you stay with it long enough, it becomes a habit. In this way, we really do have the power to create healthy change that sticks, and that power is always within, waiting to be activated.

It’s true, and the idea sounds great. The consistency of effort required to take our bodies, minds and lives to the next level is more challenging to embody. It’s normal to feel overwhelmed when you’re far from where you want to be, and we’ve all been there.

But I promise you this: the hardest part is getting started and then doing, doing, doing even when you don’t feel like it, countless times. That’s consistency. It’s remembering your motivation and intentionally connecting with it over and over again.  Practice over and over, and eventually you’ll master discipline: not just for your workouts, or your nutrition, or whatever it is that you want to add to your life to level up your health and abilities. You can positively impact your own well being, that of those in your near circles, and of your whole network just by working on it, creating a snowball of productivity, confidence and positivity in your world.

Here’s the basic framework:

Step one: start with why.

Step two: focus on one small impactful behavior at a time.

Step three: practice what you chose in step 2 consistently until it becomes programmed into your life. Revise method as needed.

Step four: evaluate, revise and repeat.

There are so many tools that can help you: YOU, as an individual, will have different support needs than the next person, and different strategies will work for you or not.

I’m here for questions, to listen and to support with how-to-do-it strategies, just an email away.

Wishing you renewed health and happiness during sun season!

Fitness Defined

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What comes to mind when you hear the word “fitness”?

Top answers:

  • Athlete
  • Exercise
  • Having a perfect body
  • Being a bodybuilder
  • Skinny
  • Strong
  • Working out in a gym all the time

All of these associations make sense. But I’ve found that fitness is much more than the above, and to get to where we want to be to embody truly vibrant health, a mindset check is in order.

Technically, the definition is fitness (n) : the condition of being physically fit and healthy.

90% of the time, fitness plans fail. Why? Because they address only our bodies, like most of the above associations, and like the first part of the formal definition. But there are two very important words at the end: AND HEALTHY. Those two words make the case that fitness encompasses so much more than only our physical selves.

While fitness is unequivocally connected to the state of our bodies, at the same time, our bodies are interdependent with our mind and environment. Fitness is a fluid state, not only about form, but function. Our bodies are affected by our our innermost mind, will, and emotions: the three elements that make up our soul.  In my experience, if our souls are overworked and spent, our bodies will feel the effects. If we’re mentally fatigued, our bodies lack energy. The sum of our whole well-being is made up of all the parts of us.

Personally, I’ve tried so many times in my life to make positive changes in my body and life just by making external changes to my exercise and diet. Feeling strong and healthy has always been important to me, and I understand that for me, I need to be intentional with my healthy choices to feel my best. But so many times, I’ve tried to work my way from outside to inside, sure that if I could just get my eating under control, or work out enough, that I would feel better and BE better. But this approach was never meaningful for me long term. I failed to connect the positive changes I wanted to make with a deep purpose, or WHY I wanted to make them, and so I wasn’t fully working on my fitness. I was only working on my body. While external physical training definitely has value, by nature, it doesn’t create fully realized value, or wholeness, in and of itself.  Wholeness is realized when we figure out our own holistic “why”, and commit to building our chosen habits from there. Why do you want to be physically fit and healthy at this point in your life?

I’ve created successful fitness programs for myself and many others for the last fifteen years. And I know there’s just no need to spend your life in a gym to be fit and maintain results. Who has the time? Do it if you love it; a gym itself is a tool to work with. Long-term, if you want to create evergreen effectiveness in managing your well-being, think about why YOU, as a person, want to upgrade your health. Like dedicating money to a long term sound investment, dedicating time to the pursuit of well-rounded fitness will benefit you many times over.

What do YOU need to be successful? How will investing in yourself energize your health, and give you the gift of fullest well-being for life?

Social support is vital to the process. The hardest part is usually getting started. You have the power to take the next small action that will get you closer to the positive change you want! I’m here to help. Send questions to me at blendablebalance@gmail.com.

Why Fitness Fails

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We all know a story of someone who lost a lot of weight using some kind of short-term diet or exercise. It worked for them, so maybe you tried it, and maybe it worked…or didn’t. And even if it DID work at first, it probably didn’t last.

I am SO OVER the schemes:  detoxes, cleanses, low carb, high carb, high fat, low fat, no fat, diet pills, waist trainers, body wraps, infomercial products, not there for it. The American “diet” industry brings in over $65 billion each year. The commercial fitness equipment market only approaches one billion, but is projected to grow to about 13 billion annually by 2022. That’s a lot of toys that claim to change your body in “just thirty minutes a week!”

Most of that commercialization is about motivating you to spend money buying the promise of a better body. You’re sold a method instead of a system, and almost any new method is going to produce a short term result. But by nature, that result cannot be sustained. That’s why over 95% of people who lose weight regain it within a year. That often feels like a personal failure, and then it’s onto the next method. Those disheartening results tell us something, and it’s NOT that we are failures: there has to be a better way!

Method = Short Term Quick Fix

Method = Money Pit

Method = An Endless Loop of Failure By Design

Using methods can look like this: buying new, fancy exercise equipment. Under-eating calories every day. Joining a gym. Going on a low-carb diet. Methods only work if you never stop using them. Some people can do one specific thing their whole life, like count calories, and be successful but…spoiler alert, I am not one of them! I need a holistic system to make it all work, and I’m willing to bet you do too.

Truthfully, the quick fix does not exist.

It’s not that methods can’t ever work…they can!  But the reality I’ve observed for every one of my clients is that there HAS to be a framework in which methods operate, in order to create lasting change. Just as you can’t expect to achieve maximal results by doing exactly the same exercises, sets, and reps over and over, you need to address more than just muscles when you’re changing your body and your health.

System = Long Term Solution

System = Real Return on Investment

System = An Ongoing Path to Sustainable Positive Results

A great fitness system is one that takes you and all aspects of YOUR health and life into account. You realize measurable, sustainable results within hours, days and weeks, and if you work consistently within your own personalized plan, you get results that never quit. Your dedication + the right support at the right time = forever success.

The quick fix does not exist. If you want to be confidently fit forever, develop and embrace your own system! I use a holistic approach, finely developed over many years, that can help you realize your highest level of well-being. Your system, because fitness is personal, and defining it for yourself makes success sustainable.

Dedication to a well-rounded program created specifically for you will achieve amazing results. Respect where you are now, embrace positive change, and forever upgrade your life.

Learn more about coaching and reach out with fitness questions here.

I explored psychology as a concentration in college, and although I was engaged and did well, it wasn’t quite right for a career path. However, studying critical thinking, motivation, personality and social behavior in-depth planted some important idea seeds for me. Here are a few that helped me get my head on straight about my own fitness and health:

  1. Conventional wisdom is so often wrong. Just because you’ve heard it (or read it on the Internet) doesn’t make it true. Some sources are better than others and there is SO MUCH INFORMATION out there about what to do or not do, that I find many people reaching out to me aren’t sure of exactly where to start.
  2. Action comes before motivation.  In the brain, you literally create and strengthen new ways of thinking and behaving by taking action. You also have the power to stop bad habits in their tracks and create lasting good ones by using intentional rewards and focusing on one small action at a time.
  3. Personality counts.  No two people keep themselves healthy by doing the exact same things.  How do YOU gain the most energy?  What makes YOU happy? Knowing who you are and taking into account your life situation and current resources are paramount.
  4. You need other people.  Even if you are more introverted than extroverted, you’ll benefit so much by potentially stepping outside of your comfort zone and acting on the guidance of true expertise. You may need friends/loved ones/your tribe to cheer you on to do your best. It can be much easier to overcome unhealthy habits and create better ones with a trusted friend, and/or a whole tribe lifting you up. This was key for me personally in creating long lasting healthy eating habits.

Want to know more about how to create space in your brain and your life for positive change?  I’m all about supporting what works for you in a real, fun and uplifting way. Reach out to me directly at blendablebalance@gmail.com with any questions.

There’s a mindset bridge from here and now, to achieving your health goals. No matter your current state of fitness, you can apply these three elements to support your individual recipe for success:

  1. Context – First, your plan must take into consideration your unique personality, physical environment, resources, and stresses, both positive and constructive.
  2. Commitment – Then, you need dedication to see through your goal to the end. If you allow yourself to give up entirely, you won’t achieve what you set out to.
  3. Consistency – Finally, out of the committed practice comes the repeat action that, over time, leads to you realizing your goal.

What realistically works for you?  That’s context. Match your temperament and circumstances to the things you do to work toward your goal. If you want people interaction and love the outdoors, try a biking, running or walking group or join a community sport league or team. Work out with family and friends, distanced if necessary. If you prefer a one-on-one or solo workout, meet with a coach or pull a workout up on your laptop or phone that you can do at home. Any combination of these may work for you, and knowing yourself helps you set up well for each step on the ladder of working toward your goal.

Can you own it?  Is is something you can dedicate or re-dedicate to with intention? Are you committed in your mind to staying the course with some flexibility? Do you have a plan for when you don’t feel like being active? Can you make time to meal prep on the weekend and if so, how much time? Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you do have to push your plan forward to stick with it. Social support can help: reach out for encouragement when you’re feeling less motivated to action. Revisit your purpose.

Can you keep doing it? Is it too much exercise? Too little fuel? Too taxing for your current work and life schedule? Can you find the motivation, the WHY, to do it over and over again? The health of your mind and body are a sum of the time and effort invested. It’s not enough to do the goal-supportive thing one time. You’ve got to do it over and over again to sustain your healthy behaviors and enjoy full rewards. Happily, when you stick with positive changes over time, eventually they become efficient habits, requiring less effort and paying you back many times over.

So what’s most important to you and why? If you’ve tried in the past and stopped short of your goal, go back to your ingredients. Did you think about context? Did you devote to a realistic goal? Did you practice the pursuit of it daily, weekly, monthly?

Life happens! It’s truly about progress and not perfection. Just like cooking skills and individual dishes get better over time, it takes trial and error to figure out what works best. If you didn’t get the results you wanted in the past, what slowed you down? And how can you get on track now to have more energy, increased confidence and greater well-being? Your healthiest mind and body are within reach and sustainable, one step at a time.

Feel free to DM on Instagram (fastest!) here or e-mail me at blendablebalance@gmail.com with any questions/thoughts you may have! I’m happy to support.

The Intensity of Adjustment and the Case for Letting Ourselves Change…Slowly

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Life = change.  In 2016, I went through the most dramatic shift of my life, to motherhood when my son was born.

I may be an expert when it comes to health, fitness and behavior change, but even the adjustments that come with pregnancy never could have prepared me for what was to come. The magic and exhaustion that are caring for new life hit hard, especially since my baby wasn’t keen on sleeping very far away from his mama, or for long stretches.  I’ve worked closely with pre-and-postnatal moms for years, but nothing could have prepared me for the fragmented sleep and 180 degree shift in focus. The first steps to motherhood, pregnancy and birth, are relatively easy. It was the utterly jarring lifestyle change afterward that hit me personally like no force I’d ever experienced.

Lifestyle shifts are HARD. Over the years, I’ve observed many others in their first steps to healthy change. Using weight loss as an example, oftentimes, we want to instantly weigh less or go back to what we used to look like. There’s a deep emotional motivation we have for looking good and in turn, feeling good. This is especially true within American culture, in which a polished and even flawless outward appearance is highly prized. What happens when this real desire meets a sudden realization that one is NOT where one wants to be health or looks wise? We may want to “push a button” for that immediate result, and we can’t possibly achieve it, so we mentally and emotionally “flip the switch” and over-commit to change. We’ve all seen this over-commitment happen each January. The motivation is truly there, but it’s only temporary. Real, sustained change takes time and ongoing effort, with the understanding that the change we want can only be sustained by consistent and realistic commitment. Otherwise, most of us are beyond our human capacity to adjust and we set ourselves up to fail. Over-commitment feels good in the moment because it meets the emotional need for some kind of change that we want or know we need. But it’s not sustainable.

How can we set ourselves up for success? Adjust the intensity of any health behavior change to a level truly do-able for you. Take it one step at a time, and maintain flexibility along with your consistency. I know that can be challenging for those of us who want the instantaneous result, but it’s worth it in time to ease into a healthier lifestyle. The shock of intense change is rarely effective.

So if you’ve started once or twice or twenty times to work toward a health goal and stopped, ask yourself why it didn’t work before. It may be because it was just too intense given your circumstances. Maybe you need more resources to achieve your goal, like expert help and social support. Slow the pace, and be kind to yourself.

No better example of this than bringing new life into the world. Healthy change is wonderful and stressful, and we can engineer our own success by moving one small step at a time, on any given day, at a pace that’s sustainable.

“It’s better to go slowly in the right direction than go speeding off in the wrong direction.” – Simon Sinek

The Truth About Weight, Genetics, and Intensity

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You know a guy from work lost forty pounds by swearing off carbs. Your spouse dropped four inches from their waist after walking six miles a day. Your best friend went vegan and gained tons of energy, morphing into the best shape of their life. But when you try to do what they did for the same amount of time, you don’t lose much fat, and may even feel physically sick. What gives?

It turns out that genes and body chemistry can have a significant effect on the outcome of your efforts.

Unsurprisingly, most people, about 88%, respond to higher intensity exercise versus a lucky 12% who will be able to lose fat and manage their weight with lower to moderate intensity work. On the diet spectrum, there seems to be a more even split: about half of people lose fat on a lower carb diet, while the other half responds more to low fat eating.

This explains to some degree why many people spend hours in the gym and get no tangible results. Most people cannot rely on a thirty minute, steadily paced elliptical workout to create change in their bodies beyond a week or two. It’s just not intense enough. Moreover, modes like weight training with heavy resistance and CrossFit can deliver results because they create a higher intensity that has the potential to produce those results.

The caveat, however, is that most people should not start with a high-intensity workout like this. To safely and sustainably progress in your weight loss as well as overall fitness, you need to dedicate plenty of program time to overall movement quality: soft tissue, mobility and stability work. Otherwise, you may be losing weight, but your high intensity moves are likely exacerbating existing imbalances further and pre-disposing you to sub-optimal structure and function, as well as injury.

Mindful of this, I recommend working with a knowledgeable, professional coach who can help you address your weaknesses and heal imbalances before progressing appropriately. You’ll prevent pain and injury and feel good in your body. Then, you can build your workout intensity and continue progressing in your fitness and weight management goals.

I’m happy to answer any questions you may have! Please reach out to me directly at blendablebalance@gmail.com.

For further reading on some of the genetic science, check out Rock Star Research.

Why Recovery Is Essential

Why do over 90% of people fail when they attempt to get in shape for the first time?

Maybe they:

  • Don’t know what they need to do to get results.
  • Think they’ll lose thirty pounds in January.
  • Promise to work out every day.
  • Drastically change what they eat.
  • The list always goes on.

It’s incredibly easy (and normal, by the way!) to align with this way of thinking.  These mindsets are a parade of unrealistic expectations, which we’ve discussed before at length and they are ingrained in our culture.

But what HUGE additional factor is easy to overlook?

  1. Stress.
  2. New routines are stressful.
  3. Stress is cumulative.

It seems to be an often ingrained response to stress to go harder when we experience it, and to push further when we’re exhausted.  Ever hear the maxim, “no pain, no gain”?  I see this work-until-you-drop, no-off-switch, Silicon Valley MO in the corporate environment literally every day. Personally, I am moving out of one of these non-stop work cycles right now. They are so common that one of my newer clients told me earlier this week: “Nicholle, I can’t remember a day when I was NOT tired.” This is not the first, or twentieth, time I have heard this during a client interview.

This leads me to believe that many people are already operating on less than a full tank when they begin a fitness program. Chances are, if you’re already tired, you’ll de-motivate quickly — even when you know that changing your health habits is the best choice for you. There’s a better way!

Here are some ideas that can help you maintain balance between motion and rest, to gain more rest overall or before committing to a new routine:

  1. Stop working. Make a commitment to yourself to take at least one day of the week for complete physical and mental rest. Two may be ideal based on your schedule and ideal workout program, the latter of which I highly recommend determining alongside a qualified fitness professional.
  2. Stand and move more.  In addition to day(s) of rest/light activity, take regular breaks throughout the day from sitting, which can be extremely stressful for the body and in turn, the mind.  Your body was not meant to sit, and it literally needs to recover from sitting!  Try to move at LEAST five minutes for every hour, and moving every 20-30 minutes is even better. I like my Fitbit for the ease of setting automatic reminders for this. Even I don’t respond every hour, I’m still moving more and feeling better for it.
  3. Sleep!  Adequate sleep is ridiculously underrated in our culture. It’s often viewed as a badge of honor to survive, and supposedly thrive, on four to six hours or less. The vast majority of us need 7-9 hours to function optimally. If you’re sleeping less, try dedicating a few extra minutes each night to turning in earlier. It will take some time and effort, and be worth every minute of improved energy, health and performance.

Apply these consistently, and you’ll have a much higher chance of success in achieving your goal and maintaining your best health for life. I suggest choosing just one to start and working on it for a few days or weeks, and when you’ve integrated that, try adding another. Progress, not perfection!

Listening To Your Intuitive Sense of Hunger

Babies naturally have an accurate sense of when they’re hungry and when they’re done. As we grow up, when does that ability go away? And why?

So much of our eating behavior is driven by our environment, culture, and society:

1) Nonstop work and activity. In American culture, a leisurely meal does not happen by default. Working professionals may be at the mercy of their company schedule. Family mealtime can be influenced by kids’ schedules. Moreover, our culture generally values convenience over spending time on food prep and cooking, and fast food typically comes with high levels of sugar, salt, and fat and low levels of essential vitamins and minerals.

2) Never-ending availability of cheap, palatable food. Not so long ago in our evolution, food supply was scarce. Not so much today; we can eat whenever and whatever we think we want. Even office supply stores have soda, candy, and junk food in highly visible spots. Sugar, salt and unhealthy fat are a combination that tastes good, but can easily cause weight gain and even become addictive, robbing us of physical and mental health.

3) Marketing and advertising messages to eat constantly. This also plays on our natural inclination to eat when food is available. These visual signals can easily make us think we want to eat, when oftentimes we aren’t truly hungry and don’t need food. The average person is exposed to 5,000 ads in a day in 2020; we can receive and respond to these suggestions without even realizing it.

How can you work around these obstacles?

  1. Awareness is the the first step to re-calibrating for more intuitive eating: observe your body’s hunger signals and respond properly to them, just like you did by instinct as a baby. My favorite approach is that when your hunger is a 7 out of 10, you should eat. When your satisfaction is a 7 out of 10, stop.
  2. Preparation have balanced snacks on hand, and when you’re truly hungry between meals, eat one!  Healthy choices for you may be a handful of almonds, or a serving of Greek yogurt topped with fresh berries. I personally keep a couple of low sugar fruit and nut bars with me to have when I’m on the go between meals.
  3. Savoring helps you slow down and get maximum satisfaction from eating. For snacks, eat a portion and wait about 20 minutes. If you’re not at a 7 out of 10, consider eating more. The same principle is true for meals; eat less of each food than you think you might need, enjoy it slowly, and check in with your hunger after about 20 minutes have passed. Most of the time, you’ll be satisfied with what you’ve had and won’t truly need more.

Using that approach will help you be less inclined to buy and consume the ubiquitous junk food that doesn’t pay you back in value. You’ll also be less responsive to external cues nudging you to eat, and more in control to make healthier choices that propel you toward your goals.

The Mindset Mistake That’s Easy to Make

Have you experienced frustration when trying to get healthier, lose weight, and gain strength?  I know I have. On hard days, that frustration can tempt you to overeat or stay inactive. On worse days, you may feel hopeless and want to give up entirely.
What drives that struggle?  What bridges the divide between successfully reaching your goal and giving up?
I’ve found time and time again that it comes down to mindset.
Humans are creatures of habit, and we often think of habit exclusively as things we DO.  But the doing starts with thinking, and we may not even be aware of the reflexive thoughts and assumptions that are holding us back from reaching our optimal health.
These unrealistic expectations, aka “failure mindset” can impede your path to your goals and to better health.
What the failure mindset can look like:
  • Wanting the 6-12 month result now or to lose double digit pounds per week
  • Forgoing a balanced nutrition plan and relying on workouts alone to change your body composition
  • Not being fully aware that obstacles and missed opportunities are a given
  • Not having a contingency plan for these obstacles
  • SImilarly, being prepared to forgive yourself for mis-steps and kindly re-connect with your purpose for change
Unrealistic expectations look like:
  • going to the gym for a week or two then quitting when you don’t see an immediate difference; this happens for many people at the beginning of each year.
  • making an unplanned unhealthy food choice and saying “I screwed up so screw it” for the rest of the day/week/month.
  • by the same token, an “all-or-nothing” mindset. Work out 5 days a week or none; never eat sugar again or eat way too much of it; neither approach is sustainable.
The biggest danger of unrealistic expectations is that they set you up for failure by robbing you of the very consistency needed for great results. Sidestep the failure mindset with honest awareness.
Here’s what to expect on the way to your goal:
  • A marathon, not a sprint. Good health is for life, not just 2 weeks or months or years from now. It truly takes time to develop the mindset and the lasting healthy habits that follow.
  • Freeing yourself from the scale. A scale is a sentence in the story. It’s a tool that can show some progress, but blood work results, energy level, body composition (lean vs. fat mass), movement quality, and overall feeling of well-being are all fitness components MUCH more important than that number.
  • Mis-steps happen. A mis-step is simply an unplanned detour from the path to your goal(s). Everybody has different ones depending on what the goal is. If your goal is to eat two servings of vegetables three times a week, and you miss two days, figure out where it went sideways; maybe your goal was unrealistic for that week. The antidote is to decide on and implement a plan.  How can you improve, and what will you do next time?  Maybe you decide to aim for one small thing during the week, and work your way up to more from there.
  • It’s uncomfortable. Healthy change isn’t without discomfort, and not just the physical aspect. You’re becoming more aware of your body, but you’re not yet where you want to be health-wise, and that’s an uncomfortable space to live in. It won’t be sunshine every day, and you’ll have solid days, harder days, and best days.  When it feels tough, you can recognize the discomfort is part of the process and free yourself to keep going toward success.   
I want you to treat yourself kindly when you make choices out of line with your goals…and then get right back up and take control of what you want to do for your health!
Do couple of stretches or take a mindful deep breath. A small action re-orients your path. Call a supportive friend or text your coach. Drink water. Eat a vegetable at your next meal. Figure out a healthy behavior that you can do next.
Be honest and present. You are absolutely worth your best possible health!
The most important moment in your journey is the very next moment when you can choose what to think and do. Be in that moment and turn toward what you really want.